Gratitude

You know when you get a cold, with a stuffy nose, and you can't breathe at night, and your nose is red and raw from blowing it? You suddenly feel so much gratitude for when you don't have a cold, and you can breathe normally, and you take it for granted soon after the cold goes away, until the next time. But for that little bit of time,  you are reminded of what it is like to not be able to breathe normally, so you feel such gratitude for when you can?

Well, that is where I am right now. Twelve days ago, I went to the dentist. I was going in to have 4 old fillings replaced. I thought it was a simple thing...but soon found it wasn't. I was there for over 2 hours, and I actually had to go back later (I had to leave to go pick up M&N from summer camp) and spend another 40 minutes in the chair. My jaw hurt so much from keeping it propped open, and when the numbness wore off, I was in a world of hurt. Well, that pain has continued. It throbs at times. It switches sides at times. The pain comes in waves at times, and reduces me to tears. I thought it would get better, maybe the nerves were just sensitive. And it did get a little better, but still I had sensitivity to cold, and heat too sometimes. I love to drink ice cold water, but I've been drinking mainly lukewarm water the past week, which is not a preference! I ate some nuts tonight, and I felt a horrible pain. It last over an hour even with some ibuprofen, where I felt like I was going to black out from the pain, and I was sweating something awful. I was home with McKay and Seth, and kept reminding myself to be brave, and be "the mom".

I'm trying to be grateful, that for 40 years, I've had relatively little pain in my life. Even childbirth was not horribly painful for me (okay, Seth is 4 1/2 years old, so the memories are no longer painful for me!). I don't recall feeling tremendous pain when I broke my arm when I was 8. I went around for half the day at school with my arm broke, and even rode my bike home (where the pain did roar its head as I recall). So, now, I'm succumbing to the pain from my teeth. My teeth, which have given me relatively little trouble over the years. I really hope the pain will depart and they will just be "normal" again.

Okay, I get it...I need to work on being more grateful!

P.S. Through all of this, you would think I would have had a big weight loss this week, what with not really being able to eat anything enjoyably, but it is unfortunately not the case. I have been holding steady.